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Assorted Goofiness
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George W. Bush
 
"Actually, I...this may sound a little West Texan to you, but I like it. When I'm talking about...when I'm talking about myself, and when he's talking about myself, all of us are talking about me."-ibid
 
 

Random Quote
 
"I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people."
— J. Danforth Quayle
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#88 A ten gallon hat holds less then one gallon of liquid.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so stupid she trips over her cordless phone!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Why is being in the military like a blowjob?
A: The closer you get to discharge,
 
 



36,819 articles May 21, 2012 558,888 postings




As of Today
sorted by Date

Welfare Check
A guy walks into the local welfare office to pick up his check. He marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi. You know.... I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job"...
Published : 07.20.2010

Rate: 4.00
Seniors & Sales
Two businessmen in Florida were sitting down for a ...
Published : 01.22.2009

Rate: 4.09
401-Keg Plan
If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00
Published : 10.11.2008

Rate: 3.73
Best 'Out Of Office' Automatic E-mail Replies
1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview ...
Published : 08.16.2008

Rate: 3.14
Bad News
A patient was at her doctor's office after undergoing ...
Published : 08.14.2008

Rate: 2.00
Never Question A Drunk
I was shopping at the local supermarket where I selected: A ...
Published : 08.03.2008

Rate: 3.62
New HR Policy
Memo Re: Cussing at work
Published : 07.25.2008

Rate: 3.31
Computer Airliner
At a recent software engineering management course ...
Format: Unknown
Published : 05.31.2008

Rate: 2.62
Tax Season
Tax day -- April 15 -- was looming when an elderly ...
Format: Unknown
Published : 05.30.2008

Rate: 3.43
Why I Fired My Secretary
Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well ...
Published : 05.28.2008

Rate: 3.73
Wise Investment
A woman walks into a bank in New York City and asks ...
Format: Unknown
Published : 05.13.2008

Rate: 3.73
The Name Game
A lady manager of a big reputed office noticed a new ...
Published : 03.25.2008

Rate: 2.20
The New Fishing Salesman
A young guy from Texas moves to California and goes ...
Published : 12.11.2007

Rate: 1.84
Company Motivation Posters You Hope You Will Never See
1) If you do a good job and work hard, you may get ...
Published : 12.09.2007

Rate: 3.80
Murphy Applying For A Job
Murphy applied for an engineering position at an Irish ...
Published : 10.22.2007

Rate: 3.73
Work & Prison
Just in case you ever get these two environments mixed ...
Published : 10.21.2007

Rate: 3.73
Being Late To Work
Rob came into the office an hour late for the third ...
Published : 08.05.2007

Rate: 3.73
Mechanic Vs. Cardiologist
A Mechanic was Removing a Cylinder-head from the motor ...
Published : 07.21.2007

Rate: 3.85
Drawbacks To Working In A Cubicle
1) Being told to "Think Outside the Box" when I'm ...
Published : 05.30.2007

Rate: 3.75
Taking The Pill
Dennis had a problem with getting up late in the morning ...
Published : 05.28.2007

Rate: 3.00
Stress Management
Just in case you've had a rough day (or week) , here's ...
Published : 02.14.2007

Rate: 4.00
Boss Bird
A man entered a pet shop, wanting to buy a parrot. ...
Published : 12.07.2006

Rate: 4.00
Knowing Where To Put It
There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift ...
Published : 12.01.2006

Rate: 4.15
Top 15 Slogans Rejected By Motel 6
15. Because your neighbor's wife deserves better than ...
Published : 11.16.2006

Rate: 4.10
I'll Throw The Money On The Floor
Johnny wanted to screw a girl in his office ...
Published : 10.25.2006

Rate: 4.09
Idiots
"If there are any idiots in the room, will they please ...
Published : 07.02.2006

Rate: 4.09
Tooth Pulling
A man went to the dental surgeon to have a tooth ...
Published : 05.09.2006

Rate: 4.00
Army Life Insurance
Private Jones was assigned to the Army induction center, ...
Published : 09.27.2005

Rate: 4.17
Please Answer The Door
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife ...
Published : 09.23.2005

Rate: 4.00
CEO
On a tour of the facilities, the new CEO noticed a ...
Published : 09.21.2005

Rate: 4.09

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1 I Wanted Head From My Girlfriend 4.33
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5 I Just Had An Idea 4.09
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7 World's Most Useful Dog 4.09
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9 PEOPLE ARE AWESOME! 4.09
10 This Is Why I Prefer Soccer To Other Sports 4.09

 

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2 The Cork 4.92
3 Borrow My Car? 4.87
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7 Staring At The Ceiling 4.82
8 Body Paint Lingerie 4.77
9 South Beach 4.71
10 Perils of a Baptist Upbringing 4.69

 
 

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Goofball Facts
 
The longest sneezing attack lasted 978 days.
 
 

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