"It is time to set aside the old partisan bickering and finger-pointing and name-calling that comes from freeing parents to make different choices for their children." -George W. Bush, on "parental empowerment in education," April 12, 2001
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"Ah, yes, Divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet." — Robin Williams
Snapple Facts
#9 The average speed of a housefly is 4.5 mph.
Yo Mama ...
... is so fat, She could sell shade.
One Liners
Q: What is the difference between men and women? A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
A woman walks into a post office and notices a middle-aged, well-dressed man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. As he seals each envelop he sprays it with a puff of perfume.
The woman's curiosity gets the better of her, so she goes up to the man and asks what he is doing. The man replies, "I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'"
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Drumming up some business?
(0 replies)
started by
j9nh
(03.12.2005 8:26:37 AM EST)
I guess he got tired of chasing ambulances! Hehehehehe! Good one!
LMAO
(0 replies)
started by
obxbeachbum
(03.12.2005 0:25:56 AM EST)
Good new one!
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Holidays Tips For Eating 1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.
12.16.2006
