Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

› Home
› Contribute
› Goofball Map
› Jokes
› Photos
› Cartoons
› Media
› News
› Celeb Mugshots
› Name Changes
› Games
› Cool Sites
› Phone Fun
› Rants
› Uncensored
 » Photos
 » Cartoons
 » Media
 » Celebrities
 » Glossary
› Fans Section
› Goofball Women
› Message Boards
› Chat Room
› Deadpool
› Store
› About Us
› Link To Us
› Site Map
› Advertising Info
› RSS Feeds

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"There's no bigger task than protecting the homeland of our country." Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush at 'Simon for Governor' Luncheon," Aug. 23, 2002
 
 

Random Quote
 
"If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate."
— Steven Wright, Comedian
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#200 The first country to use postcards was Austria.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
so ugly she could curdle urine.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: What's the difference between sin and shame?
A: It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out.
 
 


Jackie's Joke of the Day - September 6, 2000

By: JackieMartlingPublished: 09/06/2000
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

A guy's working at the lumber yard, pushing a tree through the buzzsaw, and accidentally shears off all ten of his fingers.

He goes to the Emergency Room.

The doctor's says, "Yuk! Well, give me the fingers, and I'll see what I can do."

The guy says, "I haven't got the fingers."

The doctor says, "What do you mean, `you haven't got the fingers'? It's 1991. We've got microsurgery and all kinds of incredible techniques. I could have put them back on and made you like new. Why didn't you bring the fingers?"

He says, "Well, shit, Doc, I couldn't pick 'em up."

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 27, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 21, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 17, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 23, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 18, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 20, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 19, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 28, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 26, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 30, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 29, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 22, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 24, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 16, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 25, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 12, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 11, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 13, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 9, 2000
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 7, 2000


    • More Jokeland Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
    		 
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    ok, but.... (0 replies)
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (09.06.2000 10:11:44 AM EST)
    The joke database is screwed up. This was actually Jackie's "Joke of the Day" for September 6, 1991 -- not 2000. It's that Y2K crap.

    DAMN IT (0 replies)
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (09.06.2000 7:44:34 AM EST)
    Its a funny joke but i'm mad.i gotta go to school and i dont wanna

    Finally (0 replies)
    started by alfspin
    (09.06.2000 0:27:30 AM EST)
    Giminee Gee Whillickers! A Funny Joke from Jackie! What a miracle!

    Alf is in Da' House!

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.

    Most Recent
    Grin And Bear It!
    A guy, out hunting in Alaska, accidentally shoots ...
    10.13.2008

    The Truth And Nothing But The Truth
    At school, a boy was told by a classmate that most ...
    09.29.2008

    Dumb Jocks
    Two football players were taking an important final ...
    09.02.2008

    Made In ...
    Joe Smith started the day early having set his alarm ...
    08.30.2008
    Rate This!

    3.00 Goofballs of 5
    17 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
    • One Year Ago
    The Navy Captain And His Parrot
    The old Navy Chief finally retired and got that chicken ...
    10.28.2007

    A Woman's Poem
    And he didn't like my ...
    10.18.2007

    Humor For Lexophiles - Lovers Of Words
    I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then ...
    08.27.2007

    Children's Comments on the Sea
    1) This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. ...
    05.07.2007
    Two Years Ago
    The Absent-minded Professor
    Jock once attended a Temperance lecture given by Scotland's ...
    09.04.2006

    Sad But True: American Health Care
    Two patients limp into two ...
    07.04.2006

    The Randy Rooster
    A farmer wanted to have his hens serviced, so he went ...
    07.03.2006

    Yah, Alles Ist Gut
    A doctor started an affair with his nurse. Shortly ...
    06.04.2006
    Lookie Here!
    Top Comedy Movies

    Goofball Facts
     
    In order for a deck of cards to be mixed up enough to play with properly, it should be shuffled at least seven times.