It has often been suggested that the English language should have male
and female nouns. Here are a few candidates for consideration as
useful male and female nouns:
SWISS ARMY KNIFE -- male, because even though it appears useful for a
wide variety of work, it spends most of its time just opening bottles.
KIDNEYS -- female, because they always go to the bathroom in pairs.
PENLIGHT -- male, because it can be turned on very easily, but isn't
very bright.
TIRE -- male, because it goes bald and often is over-inflated.
HOT AIR BALLOON: male, because to get it to go anywhere you have to
light a fire under it.
.
.
and, of course, there's the hot air part.
SPONGES -- female, because they are soft and squeezable and retain
water.
WEB PAGE -- female, because it is always getting hit on.
SHOE -- male, because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging
out.
COPIER -- female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up.
Because it is an effective reproductive device when the right buttons
are pushed.
Because it can wreak havoc when the wrong buttons are
pushed.
ZIPLOC BAGS -- male, because they hold everything in, but you can always
see right through them.
SUBWAY -- male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.
HOURGLASS -- female, because over time, the weight shifts to the
bottom.
HAMMER -- male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000
years, but it's handy to have around and is good for killing bugs.
Love the country, live to pee outside!
