Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"Neither in French nor in English nor in Mexican." -George W. Bush, declining to take reporters' questions during a photo op with Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chretien, April 21, 2001
 
 

Random Quote
 
"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."
— Barbara Bush, former U.S. First Lady
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#8 A bee has 5 eyes.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
... is so fat, When I yell "Kool-Aid," she comes crashing through the wall.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
 
 


Smart Dog

By: acidintervalPublished: 02/14/2004
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

A wealthy man decided to go on a safari in Africa. He took his faithful pet dachshund along for company.

One day the dachshund starts chasing butterflies and before long the dachshund discovers that he is lost. So, wandering about he notices aleopard heading rapidly in his direction with the obvious intention of having lunch.

The dachshund thinks, "OK, I'm in deep trouble now!" Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by, and immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat.

Just as the leopard is about toleap, the dachshund exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard. I wonder if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this the leopard halts his attack in mid-stride, as a look of terrorcomes over him, and slinks away into the trees. "Whew," says the leopard. "That was close. That dachshund nearly had me."

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So, off he goes.

But the dachshund saw him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figured that something must be up.

The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard. The leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine."

Now the dachshund sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back, and thinks, "What am I going to do now?" But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers pretending he hasn't seen them yet and just when they get close enough to hear, the dachshund says, "Where's that monkey? I sent him off over half an hour ago to bring me another leopard."

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • German Teaches Dog Hitler salute
  • Dog Lip
  • Hot Dog Vendor
  • My Neighbor's Dog
  • Dog Learns To Sort Mail
  • Dog Gets Unique Memorial
  • Smart Glass Knows When It Needs Another Beer
  • Minnesota Man Shot by His Dog
  • Dog Freezer Lands In Jail
  • Dog Coughs Up a Couple of Karats
  • Dog Enlightened During a Walk in the Park
  • Burlington Recalls Dog Fur Coats
  • Dog Survives 24 Hours Buried In Avalanche
  • Thieves Snort a Line Of Dog
  • Feuding Cat and Dog Call Police on Phone
  • Flying Doghouse, Complete With Dog
  • University Degrees For Smart Pets
  • Hunter Loses Eye To Rifle-Firing Dog
  • Where my dog?
  • Dog in a Bathtub

  • More Miscellaneous Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    hahahahahahaha (0 replies)
    started by bigjohn2
    (02.15.2004 9:14:28 PM EST)

    great joke man

    Ah yes (0 replies)
    started by tjshere
    (02.14.2004 11:09:53 AM EST)


    When you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle `em with bullshit instead. Funny stuff, Acid.

    my schween is small but my tongue is mighty!

    That is ........ (0 replies)
    started by thegrandpatron
    (02.14.2004 10:01:53 AM EST)


    probably the same monkey
    that threw the coconuts
    at the mouse
    boinking the elephant.

    LMMFAO (0 replies)  
    started by thecritic
    (02.14.2004 0:25:09 AM EST)


    Now THAT was funny and one I've never heard..

    Thanks Acid

    Cowboys ain't easy to love

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Unknown Chinese Proverbs
    Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.
    11.17.2008

    Suicide Hotline
    Iwas depressed last night so, I called Lifeline.....
    11.14.2008

    Words And Alcohol
    Things that are difficult to say when drunk ...
    11.11.2008

    Mick Jagger's Frog
    A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. ...
    10.09.2008

    Rate This!

    4.07 Goofballs of 5
    14 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Don't You Just Love Engrish?
    Doctors' office, Rome: "SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER ...
    11.19.2007

    Thoughts For The Weekend
    Wouldn't it be nice if ...
    11.17.2007

    Nurse
    A nurse walks into a bank totally exhausted after ...
    11.06.2007

    10 Year Old Blues
    A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about ...
    10.29.2007

    Two Years Ago
    Jack's Last Will And Testament
    Jack has died. His lawyer is standing before the family ...
    11.22.2006

    Two-By-Fours
    Some men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. ...
    11.21.2006

    How Moses Got The 10 Commandments
    God went to the Arabs and said, "I have Commandments ...
    11.20.2006

    Smart Granddaughter
    Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old granddaughter ...
    11.17.2006

    Lookie Here!
    Mug Shots : Celebrities Under Arrest

    Goofball Facts
     
    Tibetans drink tea made of salt and rancid yak butter!