Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"One of the most meaningful things that's happened to me since I've been the governor - the president - governor - president. Oops. Ex-governor. I went to Bethesda Naval Hospital to give a fellow a Purple Heart, and at the same moment I watched him - get a Purple Heart for action in Iraq - and at that same - right after I gave him the Purple Heart, he was sworn in as a citizen of the United States - a Mexican citizen, now a United States citizen." - Washington, D.C., Jan. 9, 2004
 
 

Random Quote
 
"Whoever thought up the word "Mammogram"? Every time I hear it, I think I'm supposed to put my breast in an envelope and send it to someone."
— Jan King
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#40 It is possible to lead a cow up stairs but not down.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
... is so fat, When she fell over, she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: What's the Cuban National Anthem?
A: "Row, Row, Row Your Boat"
 
 


Don't Mess With Old People

By: bd2sonPublished: 09/20/2004
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

Harald was an old man. He was sick and in the hospital. There was one young nurse that just drove him crazy. Every time she came in, she would talk to him like he was a little child. She would say in a patronizing tone of voice, "And how are we doing this morning, or are we ready for a bath, or are we hungry?"

Old Harald had had enough of this particular nurse. One day, Old Harald had breakfast, pulled the juice off the tray, and put it on his bed side stand. He had been given a urine bottle to fill for testing. The juice was apple juice. So .. you know where the juice went!

The nurse came in a little later, picked up the urine bottle and looked at it. "My, but it seems we are a little cloudy today .." At this, Old Harald snatched the bottle out of her hand, popped off the top, and drank it down, saying, "Well, I'll run it through again. Maybe I can filter it better this time."

The nurse fainted ...! Old Harald just smiled!

DON'T MESS WITH OLD PEOPLE!!!!

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Two Old People?
  • Old With An Attitude
  • The little old lady and the bet
  • Deep Thoughts for Shallow People...
  • The Old Mule
  • New Phrases / Old Phrases
  • San Francisco Weighs Law To Protect Fat People
  • How To Annoy People
  • Huge Withdrawal for 16 Year Old
  • Handyman Cashes in on 8-year-old's Driving Skills
  • N.C. County Has Most People Named Love
  • The Old Man
  • Old Man Loses Marbles Over Golf Balls
  • An Old Man In A Diner
  • A Drink To Old Times
  • 100 Year Old Twins
  • Old Fart
  • 18 Year Old Bride Spends Night in Slammer
  • 21-Year-Old Babe On Bond for Bagging Underage Boy
  • 21 Month Old Vacuum Freak

  • More Miscellaneous Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    I'll have to (0 replies)
    started by ajk454
    (09.20.2005 9:40:27 AM EST)

    remember that one for future use!

    This is funny (0 replies)
    started by thegrandpatron
    (09.20.2004 10:04:21 AM EST)


    LOL

    LMAO (0 replies)  
    started by thecritic
    (09.20.2004 0:53:53 AM EST)


    I wonder how he handles the enemas

    Cowboys ain't easy to love
    A Smith and Wesson beats four aces

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Unknown Chinese Proverbs
    Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.
    11.17.2008

    Suicide Hotline
    Iwas depressed last night so, I called Lifeline.....
    11.14.2008

    Words And Alcohol
    Things that are difficult to say when drunk ...
    11.11.2008

    Mick Jagger's Frog
    A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. ...
    10.09.2008

    Rate This!

    3.91 Goofballs of 5
    11 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Don't You Just Love Engrish?
    Doctors' office, Rome: "SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER ...
    11.19.2007

    Thoughts For The Weekend
    Wouldn't it be nice if ...
    11.17.2007

    Nurse
    A nurse walks into a bank totally exhausted after ...
    11.06.2007

    10 Year Old Blues
    A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about ...
    10.29.2007

    Two Years Ago
    Jack's Last Will And Testament
    Jack has died. His lawyer is standing before the family ...
    11.22.2006

    Two-By-Fours
    Some men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. ...
    11.21.2006

    How Moses Got The 10 Commandments
    God went to the Arabs and said, "I have Commandments ...
    11.20.2006

    Smart Granddaughter
    Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old granddaughter ...
    11.17.2006

    Lookie Here!
    The Solo Joke Book

    Goofball Facts
     
    In its ancient form, the carrot was purple, not orange.