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George W. Bush
 
"We will be steadfast and strong in our desire to make the world more free."Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush at 'Simon for Governor' Luncheon," Aug. 23, 2002
 
 

Random Quote
 
"The idea that Bill Gates has appeared like a knight in shining armour to lead all customers out of a mire of technological chaos neatly ignores the fact that it was he who, by peddling second-rate technology, led them into it in the first place."
— Douglas Adams
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#173 Chinese is the most spoken language in the world.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
has no ears.... I seen the bitch trying on sunglasses
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: What does it mean when the flag at the post offiice is flying at half-mast?
A: They're hiring.
 
 


Risque Q & A

By: DrEvilPublished: 01/12/1999
 
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Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
A: Ask your mom

Q: How do you embarrass an archeologist?
A: Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

Q: What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
A: Wiped his ass

Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead?
A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up

Q: What do the gynecologist and the pizza delivery guy have in common?
A: They both get to smell the goods but neither one of them can eat it

Q: How can you tell if you are at a bulimic bachelor party?
A: The cake jumps out of the girl

Q: Why does a bride wear white?
A: Because the dishwasher should match the stove and the refrigerator.

Q: What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?
A: Full

Q: What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
A: Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak

Q: How is pubic hair like parsley?
A: You push it to the side before you start eating.

Q: What is blonde, has six legs and roams Michael Jackson's dreams every night?
A: Hanson

Q: If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong?
A: Made her chain too long

Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw

Q: What do you call a dog with 4" legs and 6" steel balls?
A: Sparky

Q: What's the difference between Courtney Love and Wayne Gretzky?
A: Wayne takes a shower after three periods.

Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and greyhound racing?
A: The greyhounds wait for the hares to come out

Q: What's somewhat brown and often found in kid's underpants?
A: Michael Jackson's hand.

Q: How is a woman like a condom?
A: Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick

Q: What is the similarity between a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken?
A: By the time you've finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.

Q: How are tornadoes and marriage alike?
A: They both begin with a lot of sucking and blowing and in the end, you lose your house

Q: What's the difference between a bitch and a whore?
A: A whore sleeps with everybody at the party and a bitch sleeps with everybody at the party except you

Q: What's the diff between love, true love, and showing off?
A: Spitting, swallowing and gargling.

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