Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"Maybe between the time I left Camp David and here I'll learn more."—Bush, speaking to reporters after returning from Camp David Source: Public Papers of the Presidents, "Remarks on Returning From CampDavid, Maryland, and an Exchange with Reporters," March 23, 2003
 
 

Random Quote
 
"I must be getting old because nowadays I find I'm more interested in the food I eat than in th girl who serves it."
— John Steinbeck
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#166 Before mercury, brandy was used to fill thermometers.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
glasses are is so thick that when she looks on a map she can seen people waving.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: What do you call Raggedy Ann laying in the dirt with a rock in her mouth?
A: A dirty cotton rock sucker
 
 


News Headlines for the Intellectually-Impaired

By: TheAdvisorPublished: 01/20/1999
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

The following are REAL newspaper headlines from various US newspapers in 1995.

Malls try to attract shoppers
The Baltimore Sun, October 22

Official: Only rain will cure drought
The Herald-News, Westpost, Massachusetts

Teen-age girls often have babies fathered by men
The SundayOregonian, September 24

Low Wages Said Key to Poverty
Newsday,July 11

Man shoots neighbor with machete
The Miami Herald, July 3

Tomatoes come in big, little,medium sizes
The Daily Progress, Charlottesville, Virginia, March 30

Dirty-Air Cities Far Deadlier Than Clean Ones, Study Shows
The New York Times, March 10

Man clings to life after fatal blast
Tucson Citizen, January 10

Man Run Over by Freight Train Dies
The Los Angeles Times, March 2

Scientists see quakes in L.A. future
The Oregonian, January 28

Free Advice: Bundle up when out in the cold
Lexington Herald-Leader, January 26

Prosecution paints O.J. as a wife-killer
Fort Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel, January 25

Economist uses theory to explain economy
Collinsville Herald-Journal, February 8

Bible church's focus is the Bible
Saint Augustine Record, Florida, December 3, 1994

Clinton pledges restraint in use of nuclear weapons
Cedar Rapids Gazette, April 6

Discoveries: Older blacks have edge in longevity
The Chicago Tribune, March 5

Chancellor Wants Students To Take Required Courses
The Banner Herald, Athens, Georgia, March 13

Court Rules Boxer Shorts Are Indeed Underwear
Journal of Commerce, April 20

Dysfunctional families can have harmful effect on children
The Daily Gazette of Schenectady, New York, May 1

Lack of brains hinders research
The Columbus Dispatch, April 16

How we feel about ourselves is the core of self-esteem, says author Louise Hart
Boulder, Colorado, Sunday Camera, February 5

Fish lurk in streams
Rochester, New York, Democrat & Chronicle, January 29

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Where Babies Come from
  • Autopsy conducted on 12-pound teen-age girl
  • Babies
  • Chyna's A Man Baby!
  • Baby Listings Pulled from Online Auction
  • Baby elephant trunk
  • Baby elephant trunk
  • Baby Bonnet Exhibitionist
  • Parents Stow Baby In Locker, Go To Dinner
  • Hey baby how about it.
  • Baby fight
  • Baby Powder Lesbians
  • Dancing Baby Hit By Car
  • Weenie baby
  • Weenie Baby
  • Burn Baby Burn
  • Clinton Baby Located
  • Blend em' up baby
  • Drunken Baby
  • Kick The Baby

  • More Stupid News...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    THE PRESS (0 replies)
    started by donut38
    (01.20.2001 0:08:19 AM EST)

    HAS A REMARKABLE VIEW OF THE OBVIOUS

    its true (0 replies)  
    started by tattoocouple
    (06.26.2000 5:58:51 PM EST)

    and the american public believes every word of it !!!

    duh is this for real ?

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Police Arrest Man For Car Wash Vacuum Sex
    Police say a Michigan man ...
    11.10.2008

    Man Charged After Passing Gas Toward Cop
    A West Virginia man who police said passed gas and fanned it toward a patrolman has been charged with battery on a police officer ...
    09.29.2008

    Cuffed, Booked For Not Paying Library Fines
    A Wisconsin woman has been arrested ...
    09.01.2008

    Woman Kills Husband With Folding Couch
    St Petersburg's Channel Five said the man's wife, upset with her husband for being drunk and refusing to get up, kicked a handle after an argument, activating a mechanism that folds the couch up against a wall.
    08.09.2008

    Rate This!

    3.45 Goofballs of 5
    226 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Big Winner to Become Big Loser
    The winner of a $1 million lottery scratch ticket may not be so lucky after all: He's a convicted bank robber who isn't supposed to gamble. Timothy Elliott faces a Dec. 7 court hearing over whether he violated his probation when he bought the $10 ticket for the $800 Million Spectacular game at a supermarket in Hyannis.
    11.29.2007

    Man Caught Trying To Have Sex With Bicycle
    They used a master key to unlock the door and they then observed the accused wearing only a white T-shirt, naked from the waist down. The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex."
    11.19.2007

    Homeless Man Dresses In Women’s Underwear, Takes Snooze At Store
    Joplin, Mo- Employees of Kohl’s department store in ...
    11.18.2007

    Thank You Science
    Researchers at Granada University in Spain said drinking beer after strenuous physical activity can be beneficial for the body. The scientists said their study found beer can help dehydrated people retain liquid better than water alone ...
    11.03.2007

    Two Years Ago
    PS3's Are Too Big
    We all know that Playstation 3 is out and getting ...
    11.23.2006

    Califoria Couple Calls For Orgasm For Peace
    Two peace activists have planned a massive anti-war demonstration for the first day of winter. But they don't want you marching in the streets. They'd much rather you just stay home.
    11.22.2006

    Brit Burns Bum With Firecracker
    A 22-year-old man suffered internal injuries ...
    11.10.2006

    Burglar Robs Surveillance Camera Store
    In the long and noble history of the world's most ...
    11.07.2006

    Lookie Here!
    Spy vs. Spy Casebook

    Goofball Facts
     
    If NASA sent birds into space they would soon die, they need gravity to swallow.