"The fact that he relies on facts...says things that are not factual...are going to undermine his campaign."-New York Times, March 4, 2000
Random Quote
"Mars is essentially in the same orbit... Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe." — Vice President Dan Quayle, 8/11/89
Snapple Facts
#91 There are more telephones then people in Washington D.C.
Yo Mama ...
is so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
One Liners
Q: What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies? A: A bingo machine.
A police officer in Ohio responded to a call that was made to
911. She had no details before arriving except that
someone was
reporting that his father was not breathing. Upon arrival, the
officer found the man face down on the couch, naked. When she
rolled him over to check for a pulse and to start CPR if
necessary, she noticed burn marks around his genitals.
After the ambulance arrived and removed the man (who turned
out to be dead on arrival at hospital), the police made a closer
inspection of the couch, and noticed that the man had made a
hole between the cushions. Upon flipping the couch over they
discovered what caused his death. Apparently the man had a habit
of putting his penis between the cushions, down into the hole
and between two electric sanders (with the sandpaper removed for
obvious reasons). According to the story, after his orgasm the
... ahem ... discharge shorted out one of the sanders,
electrocuting him to death.
Darwin Award
(0 replies)
started by
Anonymous Goofball
(06.20.2000 0:11:31 AM EST)
This one has potential!!!
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